Culinary craze

Tonight on MasterChef: Luke cleaned the barbecue, threw eight honey-something sausages on the grill and prepared a salad. He even cut the tomatoes himself. The real challenge was finishing the meal within the time limit (three hours) while preparing a side dish with that ‘crunch’ the judges love. With minutes to spare, Luke ripped open a garlic bread roll and tossed it into the oven.

When it came to plating Luke realised that there was not enough space for the garlic bread. Sadly, the dish was missing that crispness. And then he snatched another plate from the kitchen, problem solved.

Luke survived elimination.

Is it just me or is every MasterChef ep the same? Why do I watch it?

I suppose I enjoy food and take pleasure in the wins and fails of others being creative in the kitchen. There’s something vicarious about watching the contestants struggle with their design brief.

Those who know my love for Golden Wok dim-sims will recall a time when I steamed half a dozen of the bastards and left them for hours. The pot was on the flame for so long that all the water had evaporated and blackened the bottom of the stainless steel.  Daddio was so afraid of what Mum’s reaction would be that he forced me to eat all those well-steamed dimmies and then scrub the shit outta that pot.

Those dim-sims were the best dim-sims I have ever had. Sure, I was crying at the time but damn they were good.

Fundamental rule of cooking: do not leave an open flame unattended.

One day I will learn the family lasagne recipe and dominate reality TV with my mad burnin skills.



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